Thanks to You
by karala13
Summary: Some unspecified amount of time after the events of CoE, Jack is feeling the effects of losing countless people in his life. He calls the Doctor - the one person he hasn't lost, and the one person who can help him most.


**Disclaimer**_**:**_Um…if I owned Torchwood I…do I even need to say it?

* * *

"_Doctor…"_ was all it said, and yet the Doctor had almost all the information he needed. It _was_ called psychic paper, after all, not that this was the reason for the name. The Doctor powered up the TARDIS in a hurry. Worry filled every inch of him, as he was missing the most important piece – the exact reason why he had been called, so he wanted to get there as quickly as possible, wherever it was he was going. Unsurprisingly, the TARDIS landed in no time at all. The Doctor opened the TARDIS door with uncertainty. He peeked out, and it was night. Of course it was. It always was. Every encounter with this man he had ever had, had started in the night, so it was fitting that it should happen this way again. He heard the sound of footsteps as soon as he stepped out of the TARDIS. It was a dark sort of night, so he squinted into the distance. He saw nothing, but the footsteps drew closer, and then he saw.

"Hello, Doctor," Captain Jack Harkness said. The Doctor smiled.

"Hello Jack." The Doctor's eyes adjusted quickly to the dark, and it was not long before he could clearly make out Jack's face. He seemed so much older, and yet he looked more or less the same. It was his eyes. It was all in his eyes. Not only did they look older, they looked almost completely overtaken by sorrow, like they had not seen happiness in ages. It broke the Doctor's hearts to see.

"You're looking good, Doctor," Jack said. Same old Jack, the Doctor noted. And yet he wasn't. Not at all."How've you been?" Jack asked.

"I – Oh, I've been…Jack…where are we?" Jack shrugged so slightly that the Doctor almost missed it, standing there in the dark.

"You look, well, you look really tired, Jack," The Doctor said. "Maybe some sleep would do you good. Some coffee."

"Nah, I don't drink coffee. Not anymore. Haven't for a long time." The Doctor nodded understandingly, though he didn't understand at all.

"Anyway, I'm really not, tired, I mean. It's just-" He seemed to be having a difficult time forming sentences, something this man had not once had a problem with before. "I…died again, while waiting for you, in fact. It was bad but…nothing I haven't come back from before. Can't think of anything I haven't been through, really. But I'm still recovering. So I'm a little-"

"I'm sorry Jack," The Doctor said. "Jack, I'm so sorry." Jack shrugged it off.

"You alone then?" Jack asked.

"Yeah," the Doctor said, "Yeah, I'm alone." Jack nodded.

"Me too."

"I – I was -" The Doctor began, "I had - but then – recently-" Jack understood, and nodded once again. So that made two of them that couldn't find the right words.

"You know, I think I'm older than you now," Jack said. The Doctor let out something of a laugh.

"_Really?_" he said. "How did that work out? When _are_ we?"

"Not remarkably long after we last met," Jack said. "Sort of. Nah, I was buried alive once, that has a lot to do with it. Couple thousand years. God, _that_ was fun."

"Oh, Jack-"

"Wanna know the funny thing though? After it was over, I went back to where I had been before, to _when _I had been before. I hugged people that had seen me only a few hours earlier, like nothing had happened. And they never knew." Jack shrugged. Then, suddenly, his eyes flooded with sadness once again, likely as he remembered those he had once known. The Doctor said nothing, but looked into Jack's eyes, silently begging him to let him help. The Doctor no longer had any question about why he was here.

"I've lost so much, Doctor," Jack said, breaking down at last. "I've lost so many, I've-"

"I know."

"Does it get any easier?"

"You tell me," The Doctor said with a smile. "Apparently you're very much older than I am."

"But very much not as wise," Jack said.

"In all honesty, it never does. You can live a thousand lives, you can meet every person, every living thing in this universe, you can fall in love with all of them, and the loss of each one brings on a different kind of pain. But then that's the beauty of it, isn't it? If losing everything got any easier, then gaining it all back would mean nothing, and there'd be nothing for you to lose, which-"

"-couldn't possibly be a good thing," Jack finished.

The silent night swirled calmly around them, as they stood there peacefully. Jack's tears shone brightly through the dark as they slid quietly down his check.

"Thanks, Doctor," he said, and the Doctor felt himself pulling Jack into a hug.

"Come with me, Captain," the Doctor said, before releasing him. "You don't have to be alone." Jack smiled.

"I don't think so," he said. "I mean, it's been great, it really has. But I think I've had enough excitement for one, very long, lifetime. I think I'll settle myself down in a flat in London, find a less than dangerous job in an office building somewhere." The Doctor thought for a second that he caught a glimpse of genuine excitement on Jack's face.

"But you never could," The Doctor said, with a laugh. Jack nodded.

"I never could." The Doctor started a slow walk towards the TARDIS.

"You've done brilliantly, you know," he said, feet from his destination. "All the good you've done for this universe. It's…you've done wonderfully." He could still just barely make out Jack's face, and he watched as it lit up.

"So have you," Jack called, with a chuckle. The Doctor moved his hand slowly towards his forehead and saluted the man who called himself Captain Jack. Jack proudly did the same. Then with a nod, The Doctor opened the door to the TARDIS, and disappeared inside.

Jack turned to leave. He felt at ease, and how much time had passed since he had last felt that way, he didn't know. He knew not where he was going, but he didn't have need for a destination. Just a journey. Alone. Except…that would have to wait.

"Just one last trip," the Doctor's voice pleaded. Jack spun around, and there he was, close enough to grab Jack's hand and pull him into the TARDIS. He did this quickly, before Jack had time to protest, not that he would have. The sound of the TARDIS coming to life was music to Jack's ears, probably an effect of waiting patiently for 200 years for that sound once upon a time, a long time ago. The TARDIS landed, and Jack followed the Doctor outside. Same time of day, different location.

"Okay," the Doctor said. "We have Earth. Cardiff. I'd say late 2007." Jack looked at the Doctor is disbelief. The Doctor smiled sincerely.

"Go on," he said, and, wasting no more time, Jack went on.

The doors to Torchwood Three opened loudly, and Jack stood in the doorway.

"Did you forget something?" a woman's voice asked.

"What?" Jack replied after a moment of standing there in shock.

"Well you only just left! You couldn't possibly be back so soon."

"Oh," Jack said, "right, uh yeah, I…Gwen!" He looked around. "Tosh! Owen!" His grin grew wider with each confused face he saw. "Ianto!"

"You alright, Jack?" Toshiko questioned.

"I am now," Jack said.

"You look really out of it though," Owen said. "I'm guessing I don't _want_ to know what you were doing in the-" he looked at his watch, "-minute and a half that you were gone."

"D'you want me to make you some coffee, sir?" Ianto piped up. Jack walked over to where Ianto was standing, waiting for a reply.

"I would love nothing more," he said, elatedly.

Too soon later, Jack returned to where the Doctor waited for him, leaning up against the TARDIS.

"You look better," the Doctor noted. Jack smiled broadly through the tears that stained his face once again. "You'll be okay, Jack," the Doctor said.

"Yeah," Jack nodded. "Thanks to you."

"Looks to me like it's thanks to them," said the Doctor, pointing in the direction of the hub."

"And to you," Jack said. "To all of you. It's always been thanks to all of you." A moment of welcomed silence followed. "Thank you Doctor," Jack finally said with a heartbreaking sincerity, following the Doctor back into the TARDIS. "Thank you."


End file.
